place a name to the [inter]face

What’s your computer’s name? It has to have a name; all computers are named something. UNIX and Linux folks (probably Mac OS X folk, too) call their computers by their “hostname”. Windows users just use a plain ol’ “name”. I’m curious about the names that people give to their computers.

Personally, the names I use tend to reflect the hardware or the computer’s role. My main desktop is P4MONSTA, as in “Pentium 4 Monster”. It’s not much of a monster now, but when I built it almost 3 years ago, it sure was. Today it’s not so much a monster, as it is a gremlin now. My notebook’s name, INSPIRON6400, is rather lame. It is what it is; a Dell Inspiron 6400. I’ll probably change it at some point. I have plenty of VMWare virtual machines on both of my aforementioned computers. Again, I follow a similar naming convention. One VM running Ubuntu Linux, which I use for Apache/PHP/MySQL/Postgre development, is known as YOUBUNTU. The VM running Microsoft Windows Server 2003, which I use for IIS/ASP/ASP.NET/SQL Server development, is called WIN2K3SRV. My Windows Vista Beta 2 VM is given a formal salutation with MISTAVISTA. Finally, I have a Windows XP VM that I use for testing apps that I’ve written called SANDBOX.

I’d be the first to admit that my naming convention for computers is pretty lame. Although it must be said that it is not as bad as the default that many computer manufacturers use (and consumers never change). I’ve lost count of the number of nasty Packard-Bell PCs that I’ve had the misfortune of touching that were all named PREFCUST. Or how about the names that Windows setup will choose for you if you don’t enter one; would you want to be named WDF43SE or MSR7R09?

In an enterprise setting, I’ve seen servers named after all sorts of things like Greek mythology (ZEUS, HERCULES, APOLLO), Godzilla monsters (GODZILLA, MOTHRA, RODAN) and astronomy (NEPTUNE, ORION, PHOBOS). Those aren’t bad, but I recently found a computer name that made me laugh a little. On August 4 of this year, I looked at the web server logs for chrisbellini.com and saw that my site got a unique visit from justbadpot.xxxxxxxxxx.com (‘x’ characters added to protect the privacy of whoever that person is). Who calls their computer JUSTBADPOT? Perhaps a stoner, or maybe the computer in question is problematic and exhibits spazzy performance as if it has just smoked a joint laced with PCP? At any rate, I thought that was a pretty funny name 🙂

Maybe I should use Simpsons names for my computers and virtual machines. Server computers could be named after Springfield “bosses” like CMBURNS, QUIMBY and WIGGUM and workstations could go by names like BART, OTTO and MOE. I’m open to suggestions.